3 people walked hand-in-hand away from the airport terminal tonight.
3 people, who only 3.5 hours earlier had arrived with another person and a trolley full of luggage.
3 very sad people.
I think you know who they are.
***
I couldn't believe that the day had finally arrived, it all seemed to have gone so fast. And there we were on Wednesday morning, and your bag was still hecticly overweight.
I don't think anybody realises how very few things you can take, with a luggage restriction of only 20kgs.
It is an average suitcase, filled with; toiletries for only 3 months, 7 pairs of pants, 7 tops, 1 jersey, 1 jacket, 1 pair thermal underwear, 1 pair pajamas, 7 pairs of underwear, 1 pair of shoes and a towel.
It seems really unrealistic to only allow somebody to take 20kgs on a flight overseas.
So of course, we had to pack the rest of your clothes, and stuff into a box and mail them to. All winter clothes via airmail, and summer clothes via ship.
We had such a huge fight that morning, but I can understand why. You didn't want to leave those familiar things behind, when you left.
***
I promised myself I wouldn't cry, and after sitting waiting in the airport for nearly 4 hours, I honestly believed I wouldn't. But when the final time came to say goodybe, I just couldn't keep that promise no matter what. And so of course I made you cry too. I just hated the thought that you might come back as a different person, that is why I kept hugging you, maybe 4 times, before you left. And why in the last hug, I begged you to come back the same.
Afterwards, I went in search of the ever elusive Butterfinger Bars, but as yet have not found any. So I bought a magazine instead, I just couldn't go away from that airport empty handed.
I lay thinking that night, trying to imagine what it must be like to be flying over different countries, and seeing the world, but because I had never seen it, I just couldn't imagine it. It was very difficult.
That is why I kept smsing you, and why I asked for a photo the next morning of the dark, and the snow, and the airport. I just needed to see and imagine where you were.
Thank you so much my darling sister.
I love you so much, and I am thinking about you continuously. I am missing you, and can't get it into my subconcious that you are gone. I was looking through the magazine and remembering pages that I wanted to show you, so I got up, walked to your room and saw the light was off and the door was closed. So I thought 'Oh she must be sleeping already, I can't wake her up' and then it hit me...'she's not in there'.
So in time I'm sure I will get used to it, but for now I'll just keep making mistakes.
Take care Fairy child,
All my love always
Your Sister
